Paterson Hackensack’s “How I Roll”
 
 
So Now That Ed Mc Mahon's Got His Soul Back, Make With The BetaMax!
Friday, April 10, 2009
I leaped across the divide, not entirely sure I would land safely on the other side.  It was now all a  matter of pure adrenaline, and forward momentum.  Throw each chubby leg in front of the other
 
All of this for you, Ed McMahon!
Monday, March 16, 2009
There was a time when most Americans did not have a video cassette recorder.  Most of us can’t imagine such a time, and modern historians have begun to refer to the cultural landscape prior to the
 
The Shrewdness of Apes
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
In my younger days, I was quite obsessed with calisthenics.  From the tender age of three, my parents were constantly chasing me around the house, making sure I didn’t do a backflip into the sofa,
 
The Truth about “The Bluff Creek Monster”
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Lord have mercy on my soul.  
 
The story I thought would never be told, that is to say the story I thought I would never tell, is about to shake it’s ass across this very screen betraying some of my
 
“Rick Roll” Me Once Shame on You. Rick Roll Me Twice...
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Now here is some bullshit right here...
 
I have been with the company for 31 years.  Thats right, 31 years.  I have seen great advancements in the way we do business, from the Xerox machines, right
 
Paterson Hackensack is a an older gentleman who sent me a lovely holiday gift basket and a threatening letter.  There is really not much else to say.
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